The end of my efforts

We had gotten back from going out and there she stood, in the room, grinning at us. C began to cough and collapsed, it was as if she was choking, her throat had closed up. She tried to get me to run I think, but I stayed. I tried to help her, all that time, the plague bitch stood, staring down at us with a sick look of satisfaction.

C's coughing began to slow down, she was beginning to die. Sensing death is a horrible thing, knowing how truly helpless it is. She looked at me one last time, as the life drained from her eyes. And smiled at me one last time. My heart broke at that point. It well and truly smashed into thousands of pieces.

I remember attacking the plague bitch after that. I remember starting to take her form as I threw punch after punch, she laughed at me hysterically. She disappeared soon, letting my fist hit the floor, breaking a knuckle. I stood up and saw my reflection in the mirror, I felt like a monster to have to look like C's murderer. I am a monster.

I don't understand, that's what hurts me most, why does this shit universe refuse to let me be happy? I give up. I don't want this. I don't want this life. I see no more happiness to come from it.

This is the end of my blog. Sorry for wasting your time.

Tom's Alive

I woke up in the hotel this morning, C was in the same bed as me, which struck me as odd considering this was a twin bed room, but that's not what I'm posting about. The thing is, in the corner of the room, I could see Tom. Well, he looked like Tom but... different, his hair has become long, red and wild, his eyes are... different. He has the same smile as he had before. He looked like a smaller version of that Fear.

"S-Skyles..." he said, beckoning to me. I walked cautiously over, you see, he was kind of holding a butcher knife. He looked at me with those eyes for a moment and said "I-I-I need y-you t-to find a fe-fear. H-he-help me or I-I'll cut out th-that preci-precious eye of yours." he began to walk forwards before a portal opened up in front of him, to which he walked through.

Tom's alive... Emma coming back crossed through my mind at that point but, I looked over at C and... It doesn't matter, I don't understand why Tom would want to see another one after what that first fear did to him. I'll try and help you Tom, I promise.

I'll make up for what I did to you.

Hanging out with C

Me and C have just been hanging out lately. I guess there's no set destination for us yet, I don't mind though, it's nice hanging out with her. C is a pretty calm person really, not really minding what we do, she's laid back I guess and I like that.

We went to the amusement park yesterday and she sort of saw me freaking out at the fact that we were on an 80mph death coaster... yeah, C didn't let that one go so easily, she laughed about that for the rest of the day... While I'm on the subject of C... I have never seen somebody love Tuna sandwich so much in my life. She's laid back and all... but she eats them like a bear.

We've pretty much been under the guise of being identical twins for the past few days, which is kind of new for me and C. I mean I've looked like people before but never really hung out with them after. Well except Emma... But I'm trying not to think about her.

I'm surprised C is so accepting of me really... I figured she'd at least be wary... I guess it's because we are both changelings. I guess I feel the same way.

I'm happy.

C

As I sat on the bed, trying to comprehend how things had gone wrong so fast for me, a woman came in. She hugged me, obviously taking pity, and straight away I began to change form in front of her. But she didn't freak out, she looked happy. She called me a changeling, telling me she was one as well, it was C, another changeling like me. She writes a blog named Something.

She's female right now, so I'm referring to her as she and her, I don't exactly know what the standard referral would be for a changeling. Right now, she's kinda pretty... I seem to have a habit of becoming those I find attractive. She'll end up reading this but whatever, it's not like she'll stay in that form.

We decided to travel together for a while, figuring two changelings are better than one. It was her logic not mine. But I welcome the companionship... especially someone who understands what it's like to be like this.

Maybe the future won't be so lonely after all...

I'm stuck in this motel room. I can hardly walk around looking like 5 year old with clothes that don't even fit. I can't stop thinking about Emma's words, even she thought I'm a freak. I can't take this, I can't take the loneliness like last time. I won't do it...

Emma's gone

The doorway that Tom opened for us led to the alleyway of a motel, I don't particuarly know where, but there are people here. I took Emma with me to get a room, we both needed to rest, she said nothing, with just a glazed look into nothing, as if she couldn't comprehend what had just happened. On the way to our room, a kid about 5 or 6 years old ran into me and I immediatly began to shrink. Rushing into room, Emma finally began to speak...

Emma screamed at me for what seems like hours, she couldn't believe what I had just left Tom like that. She told me how selfish I was, how cowardly, how disgusted she was at me. She look in her eyes, it was a look of contempt for me. I left the man she loves to die she said.

I just sat there and took it, feeling as small as I currently was. She was right to be furious at me, what I did must have been selfish. She finally finished screaming and just stared at me for - again - what seemed like hours before finally saying "I've seen the blog... I would never return love to a cowardly freak like you..." and she left.

That cut deep.

The Smiling Man

Emma was still unable to open any doors. She told me she had more than enough power for it but the doors weren't even being forced open, it was as if something was blocking them. She tried for a good while before I heard Tom scream, I looked out of the window and I saw a man, well I say man... I know now it was a Fear. His face... a smile torn into it, I tried to look into his eyes but I couldn't, I just couldn't bring myself look into those eyes. This man... this fear... he's insane, that's the best I can do to explain something so twisted...

It was holding Tom by his neck, quickly tossing him aside before proceeding towards the cabin. I tried to post for someone to help, which apparently went through... But I looked around and the cabin just turned into petals... just flower petals that fell around us into the bed of flowers now surrounding mine and Emma's waist. I couldn't see Tom anymore.

"H-How di-did y-y-you get h-here? it asked us, it was stuttering, not as if it had a hard time looking for the right words or anything, it was more as if it was trying to focus on speaking to us than something else. I couldn't say anything, I feel ashamed for this but I was terrified... I guess Emma was too because I heard nothing from her.

"Y-you are n-not serv-servants of an-any f-f-fear and ar-ar-are not ass-associated with an-any... I-I-I-I don't s-see how y-y-y-you c-co-could get he-here..." it continued and I could've sworn it's grin got wider. It began to walk towards us. "I-I-I'd l-love to l-look inside a-and s-see" it said as it crouched and picked up a large knife from the ground. "I-I'll st-start by remo-removing your ey-eyesssss..." it whispered, it's grin getting wider.

It raised it's knife preparing to kill both me and Emma, I couldn't move, I couldn't comprehend what was happening. As the knife begun to come down, I saw Tom throw himself at it. They stabbed at each other, Tom had a knife like it and they were both taking hits badly. They began to blink around, I don't know if they did it from speed or teleporting, I was more in shock at seeing Tom actually seeming to take it on... a Fear.

It all happened so fast, Tom suddenly blinked in front of me, covered in blood, one of his arms limp, he didn't look to be winning. It was when he looked up at me which made me regain my senses. His face, it was grinning, Tom looked utterly mad... as mad as that Fear.

Tom looked to the side and a door opened before us. "R-run!" he screamed at us before turning to stab at the Fear again. Emma yelled for Tom to come with us, but I... I dragged her through and left him. I left our friend, the one who saved us from that Fear... I just left him. I don't even know why.

...am I a monster?